Going through a divorce is often necessary and unavoidable. However, the feeling of loneliness once the divorce is finalized is a very real and common experience. The thought of getting remarried may be exciting, but there are a few things you need to understand before doing so. Just because your first marriage did not succeed does not mean your second one will. Consider all aspects of marriage before making another commitment. Here are some of the most important considerations to make.
Get Remarried To Enhance Your Life
Think about why you want to get remarried in the first place. Do you feel the need to have someone else in the house with you? Perhaps you believe getting remarried will enhance your life? Do not get remarried just because you think you have to. One challenge of remarriage and divorce is thinking that the second marriage will be significantly better than the first. If you are considering remarriage because you do not like being alone, then you may want to think a bit more about your priorities.
Consider Any Kids Involved
If you have children from your first marriage, think about how getting remarried could impact them. Your next spouse needs to be a parental figure for them to make the new arrangement a little easier and more comfortable. You also need to consider any children your future spouse might have and how that arrangement could work. Balancing the relationships with your own kids as well as your stepchildren can be a challenge. You have to be willing to spread your love equally to ensure all kids involved feel important.
Your Family’s Dynamic Will Change
Every family’s dynamic changes with a remarriage. Lines of communication and trust have to be earned again. Whether it is with your immediate family in your household or with extended family, getting used to the new dynamic is challenging for many people. Of course, if your family dynamic was toxic or less than ideal in your first marriage, then you may welcome change for the better. However, it is important to be understanding about the new family dynamic. It may take time to establish a new family rhythm.
You Might Have a New Perspective on Marriage After a Divorce
On a positive note, the divorce you went through could give you a better outlook on marriage in the future. You might have a deeper respect for your spouse that you did not have with your first marriage. If your remarriage is with someone who went through a divorce as well, then the two of you can relate to the challenges of marriage and divorce and gain from those experiences.
It Is Natural To Compare Marriages
Comparing marriages is going to happen. Whether it’s how your spouse cooks dinner, drives, sleeps, organizes things, or anything else, you will compare your new spouse to your previous one and they will do the same to you. Understand that this is natural and not necessarily a bad thing. Look for the positives when comparing instead of focusing on the negative differences. Don’t dismiss everything from your memory about your previous marriage as that might hinder your ability to change for the better.
Let Us Help You
The Law Offices of Paul Bowen can help you navigate the muddy waters of remarriage and divorce. You might be able to anticipate some of the challenges of your new arrangements, but other situations may catch you by surprise. We want to help you move past your previous marriage successfully so you can move on with your life. If you’d like to schedule a consultation, contact us at (727) 773-1554 or fill out our form online and we will reach out to you as soon as possible.